Brothers and Sisters of the Corn Hole generation (those wrecks, like me), thus addicted, and, therefore, maliciously afflicted with that simple minded game of "idle doom"; that dreadful devil's pastime - the cauldron called by another name, but, known to me only as the mid-life crisis game: Corn Hole.
I, too, like you, am one of those sinners, fallen under the lure of the idle "Corn Hole generation"; those idle wicked 47 per-centers; the devil's demons condemn as non-capitalists and forever threatened to have our "commie asses" turned to stone in the Valley of the "Pillars of Salt" where we will be thrown down the Rabbit Hole, Alice, by our "Betters", The Right Righteous, Conservative Right Wing, Right Awful Sons of the Alright, Air-Tight, Tight Asses of the Tea-Republicans Par-tiers with "anger management" issues and homophobic hormones run a muck.
Why do Conservative Republicans hate hobos, the homeless, homos, Mexicans, Hispanics, Latinos, Liberals, Democrats, Blacks, Jews, Episcopalians and anyone "Smarter Than A Fifth Grader"? What did we do to you, honey?
It's that damnable game, "Corn Hole", isn't it? Corn Hole, aka, the "schedule smashers game" that is the real culprit; that's the reason why the economy tanked, not, rich Republican billionaires sucking financial fumes from banking institutions until they dried up like brittle bones in the unrelenting name of Greed!
Oh, ye, of little money, don't you understand that we must select anew, a new leader, a bold, billionaire that willingly embraces the principles of "Bottom Line Jesus"?
"Jesus want you to be rich - stinking rich", exclaims the Bottom Line Jesus. It is always about the "bottom line". Business must succeed at any cost. It is written in the scripture - somewhere, anywhere, I swear in my underwear. I suggest Roman-Noodles Mitt, the Wit! Isn't he so cute? Tonight, you will hear Roman Noodles Mitt tell President Obama - "No Soup For You!"
There is only one choice and only one clear choice for America and that choice must be "Roman Noodles Mitt": The stiff Mormon Moron. The nation must, I say, must chose Mitt, so, that the wrath of God might be invoked, for it is written in Del Comic Books, "Revelations", drawn so sinfully by Stan Lee, a satanist commie, anti-christian, cigar smoking, humanitarian that "Mitt Rom-a-knee is the man's man"!
How clear does it have to be?
Listen up, you sinful Corn Hollers; God, (the Almighty), call me to this mission last night, and, She said, "Winnie, if them Democrats don't get their stuff together, I maybe forced to suspends our weekly Pinochle card game and you are so far in debt to me that it will take you a trillion life times to catch up. I don't have that king of time Merriment, The Turd. I need you to kick some serious butt down under there, in the land we call full of honey suckers, Washington on the Potomac by the cherry blossoms bush," thus, spake my "Burning Bush", then I paid her and sent her home.
Where is my country? What have they done with her? Is she bleeding by the side of the road? A victim of an IUD (Ignorant - Under Educated Dumb-asses?) I "ax" you, brother and sisters of the Corn Hole generation. Where is my country? What have Conservative, Family Values Republicans done with her? Knocked her up or down?
NO PART OF THIS EPISTLE SHALL BE FOLDED, STAPLED OR REMOVE UPON PENALTY OF IMPRISONMENT!